Em Lynas - The Witch School series
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Sir Jeremy Posher -Than-You

31/8/2016

2 Comments

 
My name is Sir Jeremy Posher-Than-You
I would like to apply to join your crew.
Having recently fallen on difficult times
I've decided to turn to a life full of crimes.

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My Turn

25/8/2016

1 Comment

 
​There's no hills
Or mountains
No paths, no tracks
Or roads
There's no grass
Or flowers

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Captain Amilee and the Secret Deadly Weapon

22/8/2016

1 Comment

 
This has been one of my most visited funny poems on the funeverse so I thought I'd share it here.

A crew of stinky pirates
Sails the seven seas.
Red pimples on their noses,
Hard scabs upon their knees.

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Where's the Loo on a Pirate Ship?

15/8/2016

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Where's the loo on a pirate ship?
Where's the loo? Yoo hoo!
I have to go on a pirate ship.
I have to go. Yo ho!

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Pirate's Rule!

8/8/2016

2 Comments

 
Gigging in the rigging
With your pirate band
Is perfectly allowable
When away from land.
Gabbing in the cabin
Late into the night
Is considered by the crew to be -

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Nautical Names of Awesomeness

1/8/2016

1 Comment

 
​I'd love a name like Bloodaxe Bert,
Or Putrid Pete, or Gruesome Gert.
Fearsome Fred would be fantastic.
Dreadful Dev would sound quite drastic.
Obnoxious Otto would be great,
I'd love to be a Nasty Nate.
But, that can't be, cos ever since
I ate a stew of squid and quince,
And threw up over Captain Kid
He went and named me Seasick Sid.
​
© 2016 Em Lynas
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    Witch School!

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